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It's about as refreshing as a $5 Footlong sandwich from Subway when I view a film that's 100% honest, and doesn’t try to downplay its content so that people don’t get offended.  This film takes a look at the lives of three individuals who struggle with different kinds of addictions, but the one they all have in common and which they struggle with the most is Sex Addiction.  Now with me being a staunch Mormon, I don’t have any experience with this “Barney Stinson” lifestyle, but from what is shown on TV and from what I hear from friends is that it’s the life to have, being able to sleep with all the people you want.  That (to some people) sounds like the dream, right? Well what this movie does is it gives you an in depth profile of individuals who can’t control their constant sexual urges, and as a result friendships are ruined, jobs are lost, families are torn apart and all sense of happiness is gone.  I’m obviously not a psychologist, but it can’t be denied that sexual addiction is a real thing that many people in the world struggle with, and it's not just something the movie told me.  Having struggled with my own types of addictions in the past (although maybe not at this level), I can empathize that giving into addiction, whatever they may be, brings only hopelessness and a sense of not having control over one’s own life.  This movie is a strong testament of the power of the human spirit, and its will to make changes for the better despite the odds that are sometimes against it.

4 1/2 out of 5

Hell Baby

Recently my brothers have been introducing me to a couple of very fine comedians on the internet, and these people are known as Key and Peele.  I do declare that these are funny individuals, and I thought to myself “wouldn’t it be funny if they expanded their talents to the cinema, instead of doing shows on… Foodnetwork? I dunno.  The taller guy from Key and Peele (I forget their names as much as I forget to flush the toilet) join up with the rest of the cast from Rapture Palooza in a movie that spoofs Rosemary’s Baby, The Omen, It’s Alive, Lords of Salem and House of the Devil.  When a new and extremely WHITE couple moves into a house nicknamed “house of blood” in a neighborhood that is about as Ghetto as Lil Wayne’s face, you know you’re going to get a movie that’s freakin hilarious, and that makes about as much sense as one of those people who live in a broken down trailer but still manage to own a brand new Cadillac.  The two newcomers to the broken down street are Jack and Vanessa, and not only do they get a new home that resembles a building Hobos use to go BM in, but they are also expecting twins!  After a while Vanessa begins demonstrating some “not so normal” behavior, which includes behaving like a Stepford wife, eyes going black, speaking like the little girl in the Exorcist, and trying to feed her husband poison while disguising it as wine.  It’s at this time that they call upon two of the coolest Priests from Rome who wear sunglasses as much as the Blues Brothers, and smoke more than those chimney sweepers dancing upon the rooftops in Mary Poppins.  This is a HILARIOUS spoof from the makers of Reno 911 that is both funny and engaging enough for it to be worthy of multiple viewings.

5 out of 5

Top Ten Movies about Parenthood #8

Easy A

Do you know those times in your life when you're conflicted on whether something is good or bad?  Examples for me would include Darth Vader, Captain Jack Sparrow, Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese, and a cheap hole in the wall Chinese restaurant that got poor reviews and will no doubt give you the runs during church, at a funeral, or during your daily morning run... but I digress.  Olive's parents in this movie are hysterical!  they are the kind of parents you want to be friends with, and whom you would have a lengthy Facebook chat with several pokes that would no doubt lead to someone getting Facebook pregnant (I don't even know if that's a thing).  So that's when I think that parents like that would be awesome, but the kind of style they have makes them more like good friends than actual parents, and that can have a negative affect on the children later on in life because of the lack of discipline going on.  Whoops!!  Looks like I'm getting ahead of myself, because I've neglected to give the movie's synopsis, which I don't think is too horrible because unless you've been living under a rock or in an Amish community you've probably already seen this movie.  This is a loose and modern adaptation of the classic Scarlet Letter book and follows the story of Olive and her lie about getting freaky with a college dude, which in turn came around and slapped an "A" on her Victoria's Secret wardrobe, dubbing her the slut of the town.  With this lie spreading, she chooses to use her newfound title to pretend to have sexy times with people who are gay or have low self esteem issues, so that they can appear straight or BAD-@$$ until High School ends; basically she's helping them out without actually "helping them out" if you know what I mean.  Obviously things get complicated for her, and you would think that the parents would be around more during this trial, because although they do give her counsel every once in a while they don't think anything of it and just let this "phase" just pass on by.

3 1/2 out of 5

Top Ten Movies about Parenthood #10

Something new has happened to my wife and I!!  The Stork has decided to drop on by and present us with a baby boy, and I'm assuming he arrived by Stork, and that he wasn't created the way it was shown to me by Jack and Rose in Titanic.  I was going to go back to my African American roots and name him Demarcus, but then caved to a more Celtic name because it was just straight awesome, For Certain reasons lets call him D for short.  Now that my son is born it made me reflect back on some of the better movies out there with a central theme of Parenthood, and let me tell you there are a lot.  To narrow them down to only a few, I'm going to give you my top 10 Parenthood movies that I feel every parent needs to view at least once.

10.  What to Expect When You’re Expecting

Everybody wants a baby right now!!  Some are prepared, some are not, some want a baby, and some don’t give a crap, and then some are Jennifer Lopez.  The movie takes the Love Actually way of telling a story of pregnant women, meaning that there are several characters in different stories involved in some ways of having a baby.  Some of the stories are noteworthy and some are just unrealistically stupid, but the one that stood out to me the most is between my 2^nd love Elizabeth Banks and Ben Falcone.  Their story is one of a couple parents who desperately want kids but are unable, even though Banks owns a baby shop.  Despite all the trials/troubles they were finally able to get pregnant, and even though Ben’s dad gets his wife pregnant at the same time with twins and treat it like it's some kind of competition, Falcone and Banks are extremely grateful for their child, and treat him like he’s the greatest treasure on earth… I'm hoping that the baby they have in the movie is a boy because otherwise I would be sounding really stupid right now.

3 out of 5

This Means War

Just when you thought the girl who eats Reese's Pieces with her spoon was gone, there came this sudden light from the butt-crack of the new chick-flick era dominated by Katherine Heigel, and what a light it is.  in order to make her hot boyfriend incredibly jealous she creates a profile on the risque version of E-Harmony, and contacts a dude that turns out to be an assassin.  All is well until the assassin's "partner-in-killing", named Captain Kirk, decides he wants a piece of the Reese.  So the two men duke it out by using their spy techniques to undermine each other, and get the girl they think they love.

The Good:
Much like the classic taste of Reese's Pieces candy, this movie reminded me of why I like Reese Witherspoon so much.  Her charming smile, her blonde hair, her perfect teeth, and her semi-annoying expressions make me feel as welcome and comfortable like when i'm wrapped in a warm hospital blanket.  Reese Witherspoon usually dominates any movie she's in, but when put next to the two twitterpated assassins you hardly notice her, because everything the guys do is either action packed to the ying-yang, or down right hilarious.  This is definitely one of those underrated movies that didn't get the recognition it deserved at the box office, but hopefully now that it's coming out on DVD people can give it a chance, because it's as sure to please as a Grilled Stuffed Burrito is sure to mess with your bowls.

The Bad:
I am one of those brothers out there who isn't afraid to admit that I like chick-flicks, even though I close the blinds when turning on "Valentines Day" or something like it.  I, however, am not the rest of the male population, and funnily enough  not a lot of guys think to themselves "Hey!  Lets bring our masculinity down a level, and watch a Reese Witherspoon or Meg Ryan movie as a bunch of sensitive bro's!"  The best way to get most guys to love a chick-flick is to throw in a lot of explosions, guns, girls, and a good Highway Chase scene.  While "This Means War" is fairly decent about delivering the "manly" goods, there will be some out there who feel that there could have been more; that it wasn't manly enough for them to swallow their pride completely.

The Ugly:
For those who are fans of the suave dude from "Inception", Chris Pine, or peanut butter filled chocolate delicacies, then "This Means War" is the heart-throbbing Romantic/Action/Comedy you've been waiting for.  What it may lack in constant battle scenes is made up for in slap-stick comedy, beautifully choreographed make-out sequences, and a lot of heart.  Prepare to have yourself Witherspooned once again!!

5 out of 5

Waiting For Forever

Oh how wonderful it is when a respectable red-headed brotha can find a chick-flick that satisfies all my expectations (and MORE!), even though it wasn't a largely produced or advertised film.  By far the most stalker friendly Romantic Comedy since "Bed of Roses", this film proves to be unbearably creepy at times (or desired, depends on which side of the coin you've chosen).  It follows the story of Will Donner and his quest to win the heart from his childhood sweety. The only problem he has is... EVERYTHING!  She is the smoken (but modestly) hot girl from the Crappy "O.C." show, and he's a bum who wears PJ's all day every day.  Unlike the main character's PJ's, the movie itself is not ugly, boring, and full of pee-stains, this movie oddly succeeds in being light-hearted and fun; it made me want to  open one of those bags of "fun-dips" candies (don't ask).  There are two things you can get from this movie.
1. A huge smile on your face if you had a bad day, or are about to have one, and
2. If you're a stalker, then this movie gives you free advice on how to be more efficient at your profession.

5 out of 5

PROM

Overview:  Oh boy, it's that time of the year where a bunch of angsty tweens get together to celebrate... freak-dancing with each other and hoping they'll get a smoochie?  Nova Prescott is your A-typical preppy class president who acts like a Stepford wife and still thinks the world is full of rainbows, which it isn't... unless your in San Francisco. BAM!  Everything is looking peachy for Nova's Prom night, that is until the school bad boy began helping her with the decorations as a punishment, and he doesn't want to because it would ruin his nonchalant (I've seen how bleak life can be and that's my reason for riding this motorcycle and dressing like a gay pirate) attitude. Will Nova and the rest of her high school peers have the prom they've always dreamed of, or will it blow like a whale struggling for breathe?

The Good:  Since C and I first got together, I noticed how she's poisoning me slowly.  I used to stay away from Disney cheesy crap like this, but now I'm finding myself loving it with the blinds down.  This film has everything an ultra cheesy high school chick flick needs, including: the bad boy who acts like he doesn't care about anyone and dresses like he used to work at Abrocrombe and Fitch, a football players who like to two-time women, and the ditsy class president who thinks that everything is going to be easy after high school.  This movie is massively ridiculous, but that's what C and I like so much about it; nothing brings us more happiness and self-esteem than watching a bunch of loser teenagers think they know squat about dating.

The Bad:  I take this about as seriously as "High School Musical" and saving the polar bears... I couldn't care less, and i'm sure that a majority of all people who see this movie will agree with me; I just don't take high schoolers seriously.  other than that there's not much about this movie that sucks, except the teenage love at times can make you want to hurl, so it all depends on how well you stomach that vomit-worthy lovey-dovey "I'll marry you right after high school" stuff.

The Ugly:  Not bad is this movie be thee says I.  If you are a person like me and likes to make fun of naive high-schoolers, then this movie is the perfect choice!  Or if you are the kind of person who eats the Jane Austen cereal for breakfast then this is also the perfect choice, but beware it might give you cavities.

3 1/2 out of 5

Definitly, Maybe

Overview:  Before Ryan Reynolds dawned the Green Lantren suit he was having some significant family issues, and he went by the name Will Hayes.  Since Will and his wife wanted to get divorced, his potty-mouthed daughter Maya demands to know why, and will continue shouting out bodyparts in public until her dad explains it.  Fearfull that his daughter will be thrown into sex rehab (what kind of Elementry School teaches that subject? Definitly no thanks to you MTV), Will decides to tell the story of his soon to be x-wife along with the other beautiful lasses he fell in love with during the years.

The Good:  I'm a man who loves to weep.  I like to weep at Halmark cards (when you look at the back of the card, gets me every time), I like to weep at a sad ENYA song, and I LOOVE to weep at a sappy Romantic Comedy/Drama.  This movie didn't make me ball, but it did make my eyes water up like a broken washing machine just like what "Toy Story 3" did.  I'm having a hard time thinking of when Ryan Reynolds wasn't good in a movie, and the only example I could come up with was "X-Men Origens", but that's because his lips were sealed shut and he had swords coming out of his hands....... wait who am I kidding? that was awesome!  Whenever the time comes that the world see's Ryan in a bad movie, we will know that the Apocolypse is upon us.  Abigail Breslin as the lovingly curious daughter was not only hilarious, but suprisingly realistic, because when everyone received the Sex-Talk in school we were still confused... To me it was all related to "Star Wars".  I forgot to mention, the best Actress (politically incorrect, I know) was Isla Fisher, maybe it was her red hair because I'm out to support my people who will inevitably becom extinct.  She was really fun to watch, and stole the scene every single time.

The Bad:  I hate how several Rom-Coms feel that in order to make a great romance they have to have about 80 stories going on at once!  If you want to see why it's becoming such a bad thing, then check out "New York I Love You", C and I wanted to stick out heads in the microwave.  "Definitly, Maybe" doesn't have too many stories going on at once, but there are times when I got lost trying to figure out which girl Ryan Reynolds was talking about. 

The Ugly:  This is a perfect Romantic Comedy that suprisingly enough the whole family can enjoy.  It has a happy ending but with a twist, so prepare to have your minds blown away, then make sure to bring a towel to clean up the mess or at least a tissue to wipe up your tears... for the women only though, because I don't cry at things... uh, I eat raw lamb for breakfast?!

3 out of 5



Friends with Benefits

Overview: Dylan, and Jamie have just gotten out of crappy relationships, and since it was such a traumatic experience for them, they’ve sworn off intimate relationships forever… well nature says otherwise yaw big dummies; especially since one of you is hot, and the other was the front runner of the gender-curious band NSYNC.  After an in-depth two minute conversation, the two decide to have emotionless sex with each other, and this way they don’t have to put themselves into a situation where they could get hurt.  Seriously, what were they thinking? Have they never seen “When Harry Met Sally” before?  It’s only a matter of time before they start caring for each other and that “aint no lie baby bye bye bye!” (I’m going to have a hard time not making fun of that boy band).

The Good:  I can only imagine what was going on between Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis on the set of “Black Swan”.  In order to be secure with their own sexual identities, these two actresses decided to make two chick-flick movies based around the same idea; the idea being emotionless sex-buddies inevitably falling in love.  After falling head over Chuck Taylors (I’m a dude, ergo I don’t wear heels) with “No Strings Attached”, I didn’t really have much hopes for this ironically similar movie, but alas I was wrong once again, just like I was wrong about all Chinese restaurants being healthy; I think the toilet and I need a time out.  This is a very funny movie that, unlike “No Strings…” has far more comedy in it, and gives the audience a chance to laugh at the stupid decisions these people make even more.  I loved how the movie is not what you expect.  When watching the trailer I’m sure everyone thought this was going to be a raunchy-comedy exclusive, but it proved to be more than that (like the pain in my buttocks was actually crohns);  “Friends with Benefits” actually teaches some pretty good lessons on what makes a relationship a good one.

The Bad:  C and I are not that picky when it comes to dialogue in a romance movie, as a matter of fact we love it when the ubber cheesy crap comes out, but there were a small handful of parts in this movie that I thought to myself “David Hasselhoff is actually a good singer”, then I thought “Even the Kraft’s Macaroni Dinosaur couldn’t bring the cheese back into this flick”.  The other beef I had with this movie is purely a personal issue.  I miss the good old days where at the butt of everyone’s jokes, there was still enough room to make fun of NSYNC for an hour, like how they possibly painted each others nails and mostly likely cuddled together.  Well lately Justin Timberlake (the heart throb) has been winning me over with his funny SNL skits, his performance in “Social Network”, and his funny-role in this movie as well as “Bad Teacher”.  How is this bad you ask?  Let’s just say I’m running out of people to make fun of now that Justin’s out of the picture, because Rosie O’Donell is getting old, and Lindsey Lohan is downright pathetic.  I guess I can make fun of the NSYNC guy who never made a name for himself, and ironically I can’t remember his name, all I remember is he had brades and beads in his hair, probably put there by Justin. 

The Ugly:  Well this movie surely isn’t ugly, as a matter of fact it’s got too attractive people as the leading characters.  Set aside what you actually might think about this movie and give it a chance, because you’ll find it to be more than just a comedy; you’ll find it to be the “Schindler’s List” of romantic comedies… ok that may be pushing it, but you get my point.

3 out of 5

Beastly

Overview:  Oh teenage puppy love, how disgusting it is.  Kyle is a filthy rich guy that gets away with his fame and his looks without ever having to lift a finger; he always he gets what he wants.  Like an idiot he made the decision to peeve off the wrong witch (aka, one of the crack head Olsen twins), and ever since he rubbed that lamp the wrong way, he was cursed to look like “The Girl With The Dragon Tatoo”.  He’ll continue to look like a drag queen until he can get someone to love him for who he is, which honestly shouldn’t be that difficult. All he has to do is present himself in a dark alleyway and the gothic chicks will be all over him.

The Good:  There are some very good plot points in the movie, and the story is simple enough that a goldfish can understand it.  Despite being ubber cheesy, there was actually some good acting going on, particularly (and I’m going to shoot myself in the crohns for saying this) from Vanessa Hudgens, and Alex Pettyfer, the selfish hunk from “I am Number Four”.  The best part of this movie would be my dear friend Neil Patrick Harris, who plays as Kyle‘s blind tutor, and he plays him with the sweet pickled relish.  It’s as if Mr Harris knows how embarrassing this movie can get, and so he spends a vast majority of his time on screen laughing at it.  Maybe it’s the 12-yearold red-headed stepchild within me, but I’m a sucker for (SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT) happy endings, and this movie provides… unlike the crappy service that COMCAST gives.

The Bad:  Mary-Kate Olsen.  Every time she was on screen I wanted to jump across the theater room and punch the living daylights out of her… wow that sounded violent… um, I wanted burn my copy of “Billboard Dad”.  Her hair was ridonculious!  It was as if Lady Gaga and Snookie had a yard sale, and Mary Kate had first dibs on the poofy wigs.  The one last thing that almost killed me can’t be helped, and that was the teenage romance.  I am under the impression that (leaving rich people aside) there is nothing worse than watching teenagers date and fall in love in a movie, because it can get SO awkward that you would assume you’re watching a Horror movie.

The Ugly:  It may sound sorta like I didn’t enjoy this movie, but the truth is I was probably more into it then C was; I can still have myself a painful good time.  I definitly think all teenagers should see this movie, and take notes, because this is like the ideal teenage-romantic movie.

2 ½ out of 5

Bridesmaids

Overview:  Life is pretty dang shabby for Annie, considering the fact that her bakery store sunked during the recession, no one loves her, and she lives with two British roommates that look like those people you'd see on "Hoarders".  As if things couldn't get any worse, Annie's BFF Lillian is getting married to a stud-muffin and she was asked to be the Maid of Honor, now it's going to get crazy all up in here!

The Good:  Much like "Horrible Bosses" C and I laughed all the way through, and I think I may have had an accident, but for my reputation's sake i'm going to blame it on the popcorn butter leaking all over.  The entire cast was SO funny with Kristen Wiig as the lead, but the person who stole practically EVERY scene was Melissa McCarthy.  In real life I'm sure she's a very pretty woman that you would want to hug about as much as the Easter Bunny, but in this movie she's made to be so disgusting that you end up loosing all faith in humanity, and almost end up jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge.  In every scene she would come up with the most random tomboyish lines, that you'll no doubt be quoting for days.  It takes a lot for me to say this, but someone else who deserves some praise is Chris O'Dowd, who plays as Kristen Wiig's lover.  I don't think very many people heard of this man, but he had a breakthrough role in this one.  His main talent in this movie was not only making fun of cops, but also lightening the mood when Annie's life became a bit too chaotic.  I said it took a lot for me to say something about him, because just the other night I had a frightening Nightmare and he was in it!  I'm not going to discuss the details because it will scare me, but i'm sure there are some of you out there who already know.

The Bad:  When I said this movie made me laugh all the way through I was mostly right.  There was a part during the climax of the movie where it wasn't "as" funny because they were trying to get all the emotional stuff out of the way, that way it could be a legitimate movie.  Really there was nothing I thought was bad about this movie, and the only reason I gave the previous statement was to bring at least some "con" into the review.

The Ugly:  Other than Melissa McCarthy's hilariuosly disgusting character, the movie isn't that ugly.  For those fo you who have lost your faith in chick-flicks, fret no more, because this movie will make you squeal like a pig about to enter the slaughter house (I assume they're excited); you won't have to worry about seeing Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan making out somewhere onscreen, and I sing praises every day for that.

4 out of 5

Just Go With It

The Good: This movie was a bit of a surprise at it was not as raunchy as many Adam Sandler films. We appreciated the fact that Jennifer Aniston strayed from her "casually hot" stereotype to take a role as the anti-hot and she played it beautifully. While this movie was fairly predictable (it was a rom-com after all) there were some quite hilarious moments that were unique to the Adam Sandler sense of humor. The kids in this movie did a GREAT job and had plenty of personality.

The Bad: Well, it is a rom-com after all, (C's favorite kind of movie) so the plot isn't the most intense. It sticks to a pretty standard format. It would have been nice for there to be a little more variation on the plot, as it was fairly predictable. Brooklyn Decker is a lovely person, I am sure. However, in the movie her character doesn't really develop. We are not sure if that is because as a real-life swimsuit model Decker knew her role was simply a side character to be ogled, or if it was a side-effect of her lack of acting experience.

The Ugly: The ugly truth is that we liked this movie a lot more than we had anticipated. Before watching it,C felt that it would be similar to Sandler's other work (i.e. Waterboy, Happy Gilmore, Billy Madison). Yet, she was surprised that it was even less raunchy than "Grown-Ups". Sandler and Aniston had great on-screen chemistry and made the movie fun to watch. While Sandler is humorous--as always, we particularly enjoyed the kids' humor as well as Sandler's side-kick.

3 out of 5