Thursday, September 1, 2011

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark



Overview:  It all started when Count Mondego (Alex) ran off with Tom Cruise's wife, and in their giddiness they decided to renovate an old home with a dark secret.  When Alex's non-Suri daughter named Sally moves in with them, she begins hearing creepy voices coming from the vent in the secret basement.  As if she wasn't depressed enough (somebody get this squirt some Hawaiian Punch), she begins making friends with the sadistic-dentists-shaped-like-Muppets-from-hell, but as it turns out they want something more than her friendship; this is not a "Friends with Benefits" reference by the way.

The Good:  I would really like to do something nice for Guillermo del Toro, and i'm not just talking about sending him a gift card with cute girls on it, i'm talking about baking him a cake and sprinkling it with love and appreciation, also known as buckets of chocolate.  Aside from the fact that the cake wouldn't help his weight problem, the reason I say these nice things is because det Toro is a genius!  He doesn't just make good horror films for the sake of scaring people, he makes films that feel and look beautiful in a very creepy way.  It was his touch that made the film as good as it was.  It was him who came up with the house that looks more like something out of Dr Seuss' worst nightmare, and the creepy creatures that rival some of those from "Pan's Labyrinth".  The acting (surprisingly) doesn't disappoint as well.  Although I love her husband, I've grown a lovable attachment making fun of the Cruise family, and I was slightly disappointed to see that her acting was pretty dang good; the same goes for Guy Pearce as the forgetful father, and Bailee Madison as the sorrowful daughter.

The Bad:  Besides the fact that it scared the crap out of C, I really don't think there's anything bad about this little gem..... wait... I've got one.  I'm not a big fan of teeth, especially right now since my crown is wiggling, and a good portion of this movie is about those while little rocks.  Usually in Horror films (or any kind of film) if someone gets stabbed in the back people don't usually shriek too much, but if anything happens with nails or teeth people freak out of their squishy minds, like when someone scratches a chalk-board.

The Ugly:  C may argue with me about this, but I don't think this movie is that scary, at least it's not as scary as "Insidious".  What is good in this movie is the creepy atmosphere vibe, courtesy of del Toro (I owe him a chocolate cake and a card), and i'm sure everyone who views this movie will be hearing whispers all over the place afterwards, but this time it's not Kobe or Michael Jackson.  This is an awesomely well put together Horror film that keeps the mind alert
4 1/2 out of 5

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